Sunday, March 31, 2013

Fitness Update

I just got done working out on my trusty treadmill.

2.0 miles.  It said I burned 260.8 calories.  I had the settings ranging from 3.0 - 6.2.  I'm dripping sweat down my face and back.  I decided to watch an episode of Nature's Deadliest while I worked out.  That said, that works better when I'm walking.  From now on when I'm jogging/running I want music on.

Yesterday I went for a walk from my parent's house to the lake.  It's roughly 3.0 miles round trip.  It was enjoyable.  I went with Sammy, Sarah, and my parent's dog Dante.  :)

On Thursday I walked from my house to the railroad tracks (along them) and river.  I was with Maddie & Sammy.  We did about four miles.  Oh!  Aaaand when we were at Boy Scout Landing, I jogged up the giant hill there.  It sucked, but I wanted something active.

I already mentioned last Wednesday's workout.

Today and yesterday's workouts have a lot to contend with though.  I consumed so freaking much sugar at my parent's house.  Damn you chocolate Easter bunnies...and you know, my lack of self control.

I want a pedometer.

Fitness this week?  Along with working out, I need to cancel my Anytime Fitness membership and start one at the gym at my work.  :)


Thursday, March 28, 2013

Weigh In #3

Biggest Weight:  264 lbs
Last Week's Weigh In:  255.8 lbs
Today's Weigh In:  256.4 lbs

How I did: + 0.6 lbs

I'm thinking I got a little cocky with my having lost weight a couple of weeks in a row.  I'm bummed that I gained weight, but it's only a little over half a pound.  This week I'll just have to hit it harder.  Also, it probably didn't help that I had Olive Garden and Hugos with my sister and Maddie this week.  I've also been munching considerably more since they've been here.  It's easy to grab pizza or whatever we're snacking on while we watch movies or chit chat.   

Other Updates:

  • I finally started to workout again!  I woke up Wednesday morning, stretched, and used the treadmill my wonderful mommy purchased for me a couple Christmas' back.
  •  I'm finding inspiration to keep myself going everywhere.  A few notable mentions being:
    • Mindful Eating:  A Guide to Rediscovering a Healthy and Joyful Relationship with Food (Jan Chozen Bays, MD).  My boss suggested I read it, so I am.  If nothing else, it's helping me to figure out why I feel the need to stuff my face with *insert food at whatever time.*
    • Pinterest with great quotes, food recipes, and the like.  I'm hoping this lifestyle change is going to help move me in the direction of cooking/baking.  I love to do both.  
    • My friend Tami's older brother.  He posted on his facebook this week something about running.  She's always talking about how busy he is, and when I read his status I had the thought, "If he can fit an hour of running into his life, I can certainly make time in my morning."  :)  
  • Last Week's Goals were a hit and miss.  I had no soda (success!), I did eat a couple doughnut holes one day (6 out of 7 days not eating them is progress!), & I did not get 4 miles done in the week.  I started yesterday and did 1.5 miles (progress!).  

Weekly Goals:

  • No soda between today and next weigh in day.  I only wanted it around lunch time all this last week (when I'd see my coworker drinking hers), so I'm not craving it as much!  :)  
  • Run four times over the next week.
  • Update Myfitnesspal daily & be within the calorie limits for the day.  


Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Feel the Burn

23:00 minutes
214 calories
1.5 miles

Proud Moment:  Jogging on the settings 5 & 6 from 0.17- 0.8 miles.  That means I jogged 0.63 (over half!) of a mile without stopping.  

For my first day at it, I'd say that isn't bad.

Weigh in Day is tomorrow.  I'm once again giddy with excitement and nervousness.

It feels good to be actually changing my lifestyle.  It feels good to be trying really hard to not abuse my physical body.


Thursday, March 21, 2013

Weigh In #2

Biggest Weight: 264 lbs
Last Week's Weigh In:  257.4 lbs
Today's Weigh In:  255.8 lbs

Weekly Loss:  1.6 lbs
Total Loss:  8.2 lbs

Over the last week I was a little bit of a shit.  On Saturday I had Applebees (See: Spinach/Artichoke dip, bacon cheese burger and fries, and a blondie) with Rachel and blew my calories for the day right out of the water.  I drank pepsi that day and on Tuesday when I went to my parent's house.  At work I had shrimp, a cream puff, chocolate cake and a corn dog.  I'm not mad at myself per say, because I think I've been doing a decent job at portion control.  However, I do want to cut soda out of my diet entirely.  Or if I'm going to indulge in these types of foods I need to not do it so often.  However, progress is still progress.  :)   

Other Updates:
  • When Rachel came to visit this last weekend, she did some "real" before photos for me.  We wrote my weight from last Thursday's weigh in on the white board behind me and snapped the photos.  I have a front, both sides, and a back view in my workout clothes and in my second biggest jeans.  I'll post these when I take the next set of photos so I can do them side by side.  This is purely for vanity reasons, haha.  I want to look better before I post the worst.
  • I couldn't find the 24s I used to wear, so I settled for putting on my 22s.  To be honest, when I purchased the 24s, they were slightly big on me anyways.  The 22s are starting to loosen, but that's from the drop in weight I've had so far.  They get to count as my fat pants.  :)  I'm excited because when I've hit my goal weight and thus am in the healthy zone, I want to put them on, pull them out to show the room, and have my picture taken.  I want to be the smiling happy girl in the before and after photos you see.  
Weekly Goals:
  • No soda between today and next Thursday.  It's unnecessary and terrible for me.  
  • No doughnuts/sweets purchased on breaks at work for the next week.  I bring more than enough food in my lunch box. 
  • Start implementing exercise into the lifestyle.  I want four miles done between today and next Thursday.  That's one mile ever other day.  Walking a mile at a 3.0 takes 20 minutes.  You have twenty minutes a day.  

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Scale Temptations

Note:  Not my scale or feet.  
I'm going to have to place my scale on a shelf unless it's weigh in day.  Whenever I walk into the bathroom (especially in the morning when I've first woken up) I have a tendency to want to step on the scale.  Sometimes I do.  Sometimes I don't.  The want is always there.

I don't want to be obsessed with the number of pounds that I weigh.  I don't want to start off every single day feeling like a failure or even feeling like a success due to the number the scale flashes at me.  The value I place on my life should not be contingent upon my weight.

This morning when I stepped on the scale, I felt very pleased when I saw 255.6 lbs.  A happy dance ensued and I found myself wondering what Thursday's number was going to end up being.  Yes, this is a great way to start out my day.  But what if I wasn't down 1.8 lbs?  What if I'd gained it?  Then my Saturday would have been started on a sour note.  I'm not saying that I should be ignoring my weight.  I do want to lose it for health reasons and yes vanity reasons as well.  Ultimately I want my confidence/self worth to be firmly in place and have the rest just be details.

   Here's what I want:

  1. To be happy.
  2. To love myself in every body shape I may have.
  3. To have real confidence.
  4. Balance between my mental and physical health.

The scale is going to have to be placed on a shelf.  Being mentally healthy is just as important as being physically healthy.


Thursday, March 14, 2013

Thursday is our Weigh In Day! :)

Biggest Weight: 264 lbs
Last Weeks Weigh In:  259.6 lbs
Today's Weigh In:  257.4 lbs

Weekly Loss:  2.2 lbs
Total Loss: 6.6 lbs

I weighed myself this morning and was very pleased to see the loss.  To double check, I moved my scale to a different spot on the bathroom floor and re-weighed myself.  257.4 flashed at me again so I decided it's gold.  :)

Other Updates:
  • Yesterday I purchased new gym shoes, finally.  They're a darker grey with purple and have good traction.  Thank you JC Pennies.  
  • I've noticed it helps if I pack my lunch for work the night before.  I have healthier options in it and don't toss junk in it (I do this if I'm rushing in the morning) or decide to skip it and eat at work.  
  • I've also been setting up breakfast for the morning the night before.  I measured out this mornings oatmeal last night, put it in a bowl, and covered it in the cupboard.  I also sliced the strawberries for my green shake.
  • My first attempt at a green shake isn't bad.  It's delicious.  However, it's more of a brown color with red and green polka dots.  I need more spinach and less banana I'm thinking.  :)  

Sunday, March 3, 2013

The last beginning.


I'm back.  For now at least.  Who knows how long that will be.  Xanga seems to be the only blog I stay truly true to.  I think that's more out of habit than necessity though.  The only thing special about xanga is it was the first blogging site I used and therefore the one I slip into easily enough.

I've decided I want to branch out though.  This blog is now going to be a mix of health/beauty/weight loss stuff.  And on top of that, I might start blogging about my mailing hobby again as well.  For now though, I want to focus on a lifestyle change here.

Summer 2012.  My heaviest weight.  I'm 264lbs here.

It'd be better if the shot were taken of my standing up so you could truly see how I look for comparison later on when I (hopefully) lose weight.  At the time of the photo I wasn't thinking about before and after pictures. So it'll just have to do.

So this is the 'beginning' of my journey.  I will not start over again.  This is where I'm going to be accountable.  

I want to be healthy.  I want to be happy.  Above all else, I do not want to be morbidly obese anymore.  It's preventing me from doing the things I enjoy doing.  I feel so consumed, so lifeless.  Depressed.  Self Hatred, despite trying to stay positive about myself.  I am better than a mindless black hole who will eat anything and everything and sit on my ass for hours a day.

Permanent change.  That's what I strive for.  If I stumble, I'll catch myself instead of crying on the ground reaching for another cookie.